I Cry

 

I Cry

I cry for you America,

Deep within my soul I mourn.

All gleaming waves and tasseled corn,

Never thought I’d watch you die.

 

 The other half celebrates

With fireworks and champagne,

Popping corks and high fives.

Never thought I’d watch you die.

 

 Infectious disease crippling you--

 the virus of fear, the plague of hate.

I cry for you America,

Can you be saved?  Is it too late?

 

  A nation so divided

is already destroyed;

I never thought I’d watch you die;

I still pray you will survive.

 

Guns and rocks and tear gas

Dominate the streets

Where black men die the day they’re born.

Deep within my soul, I mourn!

 

I cry for you America.

So mournfully I weep.

The pain runs deep; I cry, I cry.

I never thought I’d watch you die.

 

America the beautiful, from sea to shining sea

Now draws her dying breath;

the sobbing sound is me

grieving her death.

 

 

* 

By Nancy Rehkugler

August 28, 2020

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Three Months

I last blogged three months ago!  Oh, how the world has changed.  Who could have imagined it?  Those with a brain in their heads are now wearing masks to protect others and themselves from the Covid 19 virus.  But it has become a politicized issue,  with some unwilling to wear masks.  Thankfully, it is the law in New York.  Other states are hot-spots and the virus is running rampant!

In the past three months,  schools, colleges, businesses, entertainment, sports,  retail businesses closed down in New York for at least two of those months, and then began to open up slowly.  There are currently 130,000 plus U.S. deaths!

The title of my last post was "Anxiety".     Now there are many more reasons for anxiety than there were then!  As a person of faith,  I have to remind myself constantly not to be pulled down into discouragement,  despair,  depression, darkness!   Darkness closes in all around.    Yet, ultimately,  it is God who is in charge.  Our hope is in God.  While I do not believe that God would cause a pandemic,  I do believe that God can use one!   Could God be using this one to highlight the racial and economic injustices that abound in our culture? 

There has surely been a lot of social unrest during these three months, with calls for major change in regard to systemic racism.  What the results will be is yet to be seen.

For me right now,  the most horrifying news is that the president now has his on law enforcement group----the new Gestapo.  They are not wearing military insignia, but are arresting protesters in Oregon in unmarked vehicles.  It feels like no one is safe if the president has his own armed enforcement militia group.

How could we have fallen so far in such a short period of time?

Surely, the American Dream,  democracy,  "the American Experiment"  is in serious danger of demise if our current climate continues.

I can only hope that the next time I Blog,  the world will look brighter than it does right now!!

Anxiety

I've been worried before, of course.   I've certainly been nervous.   Hubby has had a couple of panic attacks in the past.   He described those as having a heightened flight or fight response in the body.

But until yesterday, I don't really actually remember feeling a physical manifestation of anxiety.  It felt like a heavy weight in the chest;  a lump;  I needed to pace.   I felt caged.   Hopefully,  it is isolation anxiety, and not signs of something else!

I have no doubt that some of it is weather related, as we have had precious little sunshine and an abundance of rain.   I believe there is a depressed condition that can result from that—-seasonal affective order or something.

I've been devastated,  cried,  crushed,  hurt,  afraid....( for a couple of days)  .....but never really depressed.    That's not a place I want to go. 

When the weather improves,  we'll go to a park and hike.   Nature heals.

I am just blogging for the relief it may  (or may not) provide.

I am sure others feel the same!

Covid-Bound

So how do you keep occupied?

With books and music, no doubt,

and the computer, of course, 

cooking too. (no eating out!)

Those are the things I imagine

that others likely do.

I am blogging now, 

and doing Haiku

(a new site has emerged for this)

I kid you not, its' true!

Neatly folded plastic food bags,

now line up in my drawer in rows

just waiting to be re-used.

I'd rather be stress baking,

but no flour can be found,

anywhere in town!

There are books and TV

and a bird feeder to entertain me.

It brings only blackbirds,

not what I had in mind,

though perhaps an appropriate

sign of the times.