Most Beautiful Day

This may well be the most beautiful day we have had so far this year.   No winds whipping about.  Clear blue skies,  perfect temperature.   I played tennis this morning and was very much aware of how georgous the weather is.

Gerry has gone to Vermont for a couple of days.  He will be back tomorrow.  A friend asked if it was a lonely time for me.  Well, it would be if it were any longer,  but it is so brief, I won't really have time to feel lonely.  I can make it "me time".   Of course, the truth is, I can pretty much do whatever I want to anyway, most of the time.  I suppose the biggest difference is that I am dedicating the day to only preparing and eating the foods that I want to eat.  So I am having no-meat, no-carb kind of "cleanse".   I am eating only fruits and veggies.  Doing without any meat is never hard for me.  Going without carbohydrates is the worst!

I have also planted some vegetables in the garden and some flowers in the flower bed.  Next I am going to go sit in the sun room and read my book.

I don't know exactly why it is, but suddenly, after weeks and weeks of silence, I am just bloggin' out like crazy.  Maybe I'm just bored and need "someone" to talk to!

Grey's Finale

I have been watching Grey's Anatomy for as long as it has been on television---probably at least eight years!  As I write this,  the season finale is playing. (currently in a commercial!)  I have watched those doctors lives closely and with great interest all these years, as if they are my own family!

There has been a plane crash.  Many of the main characters are mortally wounded, with terrible injuries.   The two main characters, Derek and Meredith, will surely survive, (because I read that they have re-newed their contracts for another season).  Derek, the world class neurosurgeon, has severe hand and arm injuries.   If his character ever recovers from that enough to do surgery,  I'll be amazed.

The main-character surgeons are all stuck on the side of a mountain, hoping to get rescued---at least those who survived.  Lexie, one of the very best characters, brilliant and kind---one of my most favorite characters, died!  So sad.  So young with so much promise.

It is almost like losing a real friend.  I will miss her!

 

On Being Special

I was just watching a Johnny Carson interview with Donna Summer, aired because Donna Summer passed away today.   She said in that interview, what I have heard other famous people say:   "I always knew I was special."   "I always knew I was born for greatness." [Oprah]   Etc.

Such a notion is unimaginable to me!   My own experience was quite to the contrary.  Anything but!   I suppose the truth is that in my childhood,  I was clearly kept in my humble place, as part of my Southern upbringing.  Seen but not heard.  There but not noticed. Present but not important.  I never felt even remotely "special", other than that God loved me.  I thought that was special, though not necessarily about me personally. That was more about God.

In fact, I was in my late twenties before I got the remotest clue that I might have anything special about me at all!   I was attending a particular church at the time,  and ended up taking on the responsibility for the pre-school associated with it.  In church one Sunday, I overheard someone say:  "Nancy is very talented."    This was phenomenal news to me!   In the primary relationship of my twenties,  I was constantly put down, which did not help my sense of self esteem.

So the idea of always having had some notion of one's greatness, or talent, or special-ness, is beyond my ability to comprehend.

When I married Gerry, I became special.  When I had children, I became special.  When I went into the ministry,  I became quite special to other people.  I suppose there is some merit to discovering later in life, that you are special, or have a special ability, or a particular gift, or a specific talent.

Discovering that you are special is something worth waiting for!   I am grateful to be able to get there at all.  Sadly,  I know many people never do!

Preaching Again

I am once again serving a church that I served as an Interim in 2010.   Now, however, I am only Pulpit Supply.  The congregation is between pastors, and without a pastor, so I am temporarily filling in until they get their next Interim.    I always thought that I would love preaching on Sunday and working from home, without all the other responsibilities.  But truthfully, no such thing exists.  Other church needs creep in, as to be expected.

A couple of weeks ago, I had a really special experience, a most memorable affirmation.   I recognized that the clergywoman who is the President of the Council of Churches was visiting in worship that day.   She also serves as the Chaplain at the College nearby.    After the service,  I made a point to seek her out and greet her and welcome her.

And she made a point of telling me how gifted she thinks I am.   Usually, I just sluff off any sort of kind remark, but she was very specific in mentioning the tone of voice,  the content of the overall message,  its impact,  the manner of the delivery.  Somehow, I was really able to hear that in a way I usually am not.   I think it meant so much because such kind remarks do not often come from clergy colleagues, at least in my experience.  Clergy tend to be quite restrained in their praise, as a rule.  But this woman gave me a really special blessing that day,  one I was able to fully receive.

I will long remember her words.   The real impact came from the insight that what I do is a gift from God.  I am an instrument.  Or as Mother Teresa once said:   "I am a pencil of God writing love letters to the world."   I love that image.